March 2012
39 posts
*Hears noises at night*: Well this is it this is the end for me I had a good life
*Gets shampoo in my eyes*: I guess I'm blind now how am I going to go on holy shit
*Heart is beating fast*: I think I am having a heart attack is this what cardiac arrest is
*A cop walks by*: Here I go about to get arrested I probably murdered someone
*Taking a test*: Don't take your eyes off of this paper you will get caught cheating and get kicked out of school
*Gets a sunburn*: Skin cancer
Jennifer Lawrence and first impressions:
Woody Harrelson: I was on my bus, and on my bus I have a yoga swing. Jennifer comes on, and she goes, 'Hi, Woody, I'm J—is that a sex swing?' Her first sentence to me.
Josh Hutcherson: When I got cast, she called me up for one of those five-minute 'Excited to work with you, blah, blah, blah' things. The conversation started with her saying, 'Think about a catheter going in – ouch!' and then turns into a 45-minute rant about zombies and the apocalypse.
Zoë Kravitz: I'd met her a few times, and she was like, 'You should come over and we'll hang out.' So I go over to her apartment, and she opens the door in a towel. She's like, 'Come in, sorry, you're early, I was about to shower.' And she drops her towel and gets in the shower, and starts shaving her legs, totally naked. She was like, 'Are we here yet? Is this OK?' And I was like, 'I guess we're there!'
Southern women can string together a set of...